Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
