Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
