All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
