Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
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It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
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Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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