If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize