we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
