so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I don't think brook has ever known best
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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