idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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