whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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