He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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