Texts From Last Night

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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again

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  (301): Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again http://tfl.nu/89sh
  Replies (29) Good night (1123) Bad night (2942)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.

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  (859): I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song. http://tfl.nu/z4jp
  Replies (62) Good night (1284) Bad night (3604)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression

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  (215): I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression http://tfl.nu/rcf4
  Replies (5) Good night (662) Bad night (3946)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.

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  (330): Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy. http://tfl.nu/mi86
  Replies (85) Good night (2173) Bad night (6290)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.

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  (970): I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now. http://tfl.nu/y6ao
  Replies (10) Good night (2795) Bad night (1036)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?

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  (631): She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that? http://tfl.nu/dqln
  Replies (6) Good night (3820) Bad night (927)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.

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  (817): If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun. http://tfl.nu/31s3
  Replies (8) Good night (1447) Bad night (1581)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.

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  (651): My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex. http://tfl.nu/dfh2
  Replies (14) Good night (1672) Bad night (525)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are

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  (773): Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are http://tfl.nu/he1z
  Replies (6) Good night (942) Bad night (854)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"

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  (530): So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU" http://tfl.nu/a6ng
  Replies (5) Good night (1376) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!

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  (832): I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM! http://tfl.nu/isug
  Replies (3) Good night (639) Bad night (316)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break

  (425): View more from Washington

  Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.

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  (425): Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break (425): Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk. http://tfl.nu/ki3s
  Replies (2) Good night (513) Bad night (384)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.

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  (903): I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes. http://tfl.nu/xsbd
  Replies (2) Good night (478) Bad night (284)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.

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  (203): I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now. http://tfl.nu/z6cp
  Replies (2) Good night (361) Bad night (460)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.

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  (832): We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight. http://tfl.nu/lfpp
  Replies (3) Good night (162) Bad night (626)

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