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• (248): View more from Michigan

  did you get my message about your dog?

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  no... is he ok?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line

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• (623): View more from Arizona

  Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.

  (1-269): View more from Michigan

  I just wanted to decorate you...

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends

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