Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
sarcasm needs its own font
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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