New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize