Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
