At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
