can we get nightvision for the apartment?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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