honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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