You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
