quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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