1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Damn victory sex feels great
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
