There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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