how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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