In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
