i barfeds in our rink
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
