she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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