I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
