I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
