Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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