At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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