Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize