I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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