Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize
