sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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