the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize