who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Randomize
