dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
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the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
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I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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