ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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