Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
