Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
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