you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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