addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
