Say something about gay babies.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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