hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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