I hope mine doesn't look like that
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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