Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
