At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
tell me about the fingering
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