I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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