I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
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