No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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