im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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