so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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